Attack of the killer pigs…
Right, so there I was minding my own business when I thought “I know, I’ll go and have a look at NHS Direct’s lovely new Swine Flu symptom checker. So off I toddle onto the first screen…
So, being an honest chap and having a bit of a sniffle, I selected “Yes”. Of course I always have fatigue so that’s just a given. On to the next screen…
Okay, so now it’s getting a bit daft. A quick glance at my fingernails reveals they’re still the same colour they’ve always been and nothing else is applicable. I select “No”, and move on…
Well, it’s Friday afternoon at 4pm. It’s been a long day so yes, I am unusually drowsy and extremely confused. I want to go home and fall on the sofa for a bit. Without hesitation, I select “Yes” and to my horror…
Now what the bloody hell kind of scaremongering do you call that? It might as well have just said “Don’t bother calling 999, you’re going to die. Please don’t make a mess.”
Anyway, joke aside flu-fans, don’t call 999 if you’ve got Swine Flu, call your GP, the dedicated flu line or indeed NHS Direct themselves.
So there we have it, I thought I was just a bit tired after a long week at work but apparently that’s not the case. I’ve caught the Pig Flu and I’m going to die a sniffly death.
RED MEANS DEAD, PEOPLE.
